We grew up with Dad going off to work early in the morning to what was known to us as “The Shop.” The front of the building had a big, hand-painted sign over the doors that said the words “Green River Machine Shop” painted alongside the arial image of a winding, pale green river. The Shop was always loud, full of sound—the ker-thunk of the machines running parts, the sizzling sound of people welding gates, and the twang of the music from the local radio station, cranked full-volume on a small radio somewhere in the back.
At the shop we could only do certain things. Our Grandpa Bill taught us how to use a push broom and instructed us to sort nuts, bolts, and various other hunks of metal. Our parents had a small business that sold farm gates and made gate hardware. Of the many, many things we learned from our family as children, we quickly learned how to properly answer the telephone and take down a message, sometimes even an order. Mom taught us how to answer the phone, Dad told us to make sure we got a name and added the date and time.
I remember when my Grandmother did the payroll; I rode with her to the bank to get the cash money for each employee’s paycheck. When we returned, we would place each check in an envelope with a name on it, paperclip the bills together with a pay stub, drop it in the envelope and make sure the amount, including the coins, was correct. Billie had a big bag to carry the bank stuff in and, back in her office, a long ledger in which to record all the information. In her bottom desk drawer there were a whole bunch of candy bars that she would give me when the other kids sent me after a treat. I think Billie liked that I was always too honest, “They sent me for candy bars again!”
Our whole family always attended a holiday party at The Shop, before Christmas, where our parents gave out envelopes with a Christmas bonus and a fruit basket that usually had some fresh fruit, nuts, and a ham. I remember going with Dad to pick the boxes up at the local supermarket and asking so many questions… Why did they have more boxes than they had employees? Why is it called a fruit basket if there’s a ham in it and there’s no basket? For the Christmas dinner at the shop, we usually had a pot of soup beans and cornbread and one (or more) of the ladies who worked there would usually have some kind of candy, cookies, or fudge. Billie always brought or sent a container of Christmas cookies that were her signature throughout the holiday season. Some of the employees always gave us kids a little gift of some sort, and I always remember how special that made me feel. The Shop was always pretty quiet then, the noises of the machines and welders stopped for a long lunch break, replaced by the noises of a community meal and a couple of stove fires roaring in the background.
I didn’t know it then but these were all the people who showed me what it could be like at a workplace. At a home. In a community. They showed me what it takes to be a good and decent human. Being polite, kind, and caring toward our fellow humans—it’s so simple. Give more than you take, show people that you value them, and do the right thing. It takes empathy and kindness to make it through life without leaving others damaged in your wake. It takes effort to turn the other cheek. It costs nothing to lend a helping hand, say a kind word, or share a laugh with those who are around you. In your home, at your workplace, and in your community, you can make that little bit of difference to one more starfish. Learning someone’s name, shaking their hand, and teaching them how to do something new is only the beginning…over time you learn to motivate, encourage and care for them as fellow human beings. That was the lesson. I didn’t know that I was learning it. And I suppose there is a cost, if you don’t mind paying it, for not doing what you think you should be doing, not bothering with what you know you ought to do, not pursuing what you wish you could do, not doing what you hope other people would do—and that cost is your own humanity, one little bit at a time.
When I moved back to my home town a couple of years ago my Grandmother Billie said to me, “Who says you can never go home!?!” And at the time I had just chuckled and replied, “Well, here I am!” I am not ashamed to say that I didn’t quite know exactly what she meant at the time. I knew it was a quote from something and I was even familiar with the phrase and, in general terms, its meaning. But I felt towards the words the same as I had always felt about them: home is the place where you can always go to feel safe, why couldn’t you go back there? Why wouldn’t you? Now that both she and some time have passed, I realize that not everyone can go home. Not everyone wants to go home. Not everyone knows how to go home—even if home is just a comfortable feeling of belonging. But you can learn to be home for those who need safe harbor, and you can teach them how to create it for themselves and others.
For those of you in the know, you may already be privy to the information, but this year our Dad has decided to retire. He is selling The Shop property and its remaining contents. After about a year of closing down and cleaning the business property, we are rapidly approaching the auction date. We were discussing such matters with Dad this morning as I was writing this. I meant to share a few nostalgic words as I posted the link to the auction website and it lead me back here. Full circle, once again. In cycles, in circles.
It’s been a wild ride for me. I can’t imagine what coasting into the station must feel like for Dad now. This year I learned how to weld and work metal a little, on the remaining machines at The Shop—and with the help of my sister Sarah and our coworker Tazz. Together, the three of us cleaned up The Shop, the outside property, and the office. Over the course of the year we have heard numerous stories about hauling gates, making sales, meeting people, going to new places and having interesting experiences—Sarah and I have told Dad several times that he should write a book (or several books!) about all of his adventures in business and life. I will keep encouraging him to do so. In the meantime, if you get a chance, ask him to tell you something that you don’t know.
The office building is so empty that every sound echoes inside it. The paint pattern that runs along the lower half of the walls was designed and painted by yours truly, my name emblazoned in the same red paint in the hallway instead of a final stretch of the pattern. There wasn’t a place in the shop or office that I had been as a child, a teen, or an adult that I didn’t write my name somewhere. Beth was here. When we went to box up the last of the photos on Mom’s desk at the office, there’s one picure that sits on her desk facing his and it’s a picture of me and Sarah, as toddlers, and Dad at our house, in the corner where they had put the home office at first. It’s a candid snapshot; Sarah is standing in the desk chair behind Dad, preparing to scale him and I am sitting on his shoulders, one foot not quite all the way over his other shoulder when Mom had come in to snap the picture. And there the memory floods back for me, a picture to tug it from the recesses of my brain. The picture is in one of those clear acrylic frames that Billie so loved. Dad is sitting at the desk with notepad, pen and phone, his face turned towards Mom at the last second, as he was really concentrating on getting his work done and we were working hard to prevent him from doing any more work! I remember us climbing all over him, a game where he peeled one kid off his back about the time the other had gotten seated on his shoulders and then Mom pops in to capture the memory forever on film. I haven’t forgotten, Mom!! I still remember. Just like I remember Mom taking me outside to play run-&-go-fetch-it while she was trying to work and all the other kids were at school. Just like I remember trying to type a paper in college and grad school with my little ones climbing up over my shoulders while I tried so hard to just finish this sentence.
They say you can’t go home again BUT WHO’S GONNA STOP ME!?!?